Blabbing About: VPR S11 Reunion Part 1
"You should fire your PR team" — Andy Cohen
Last week someone asked me if James Kennedy (British DJ, Reality TV star, & Number One Guy in the Group) was related to the (American) Kennedy family. The answer is no, but DJ JK did tell us at the beginning of this episode that he was serving “Kennedy Kennedy” tonight, which I think was him trying to say he was giving his best suave JFK-esque fit and I’d say he did a good job in his little pastel get up.
You know who didn’t do a good job? *Everyone answers in unison* Tom Sandoval! I wish I could say I’m shook that he still has not learned a single thing, but I simply expected exactly this. Before we get into that, we have to make it about Scheana (it’s what she would want).
We’re 6 mins into the episode and Andy asks Ariana & Sandoval what ever happened to the Lego masterpiece portrait of the two of them. WITHOUT HESITATION, Scheana says “we never got to see what I did with that” MA’AM, THIS IS A WENDY’S. I’m sad for myself that her saying that even got a rise out of me because it was so perfectly timed and well-executed on her part. She yet again made it about her. You go Glen Coco.
After Schwartz talked about never getting to propose again, we got potentially THE most telling statement from Sandoval to date. LVP naturally asks the Toms why they would want to live together because they’re both grown ups (they aren’t actually, but fine). Sandoval responds with the most casual comment that his literal grown father in his 60s does in fact have roommates. It’s all making sense now.
Honestly, this episode is moving so fast it’s hard to keep up. Sandoval called Rachel a coward, Schwartz said that Rachel playing the victim is “malarky” (which I would assume was his vocabulary word of the day). And then we get into the revenge porn case that Rachel has named Ariana and Sandoval in. All I’m going to say about that is it needs to be handled off camera, it’s too far.
In a shocking turn of events, Scheana is going HARD for Ariana, in a good way. She has her back, she’s defending her against Sandoval, she’s saying what a lot of us were hoping would be said. This surprised me given that just two days ago Scheana said on her world-renowned podcast that she currently doesn’t speak to Sandoval NOR Ariana…
I’m not going to go into the conversation about the dark thoughts both Sandoval and Ariana have experienced. I will say that Sandoval still did not understand that there is a massive difference between him bringing it to cameras on his own accord versus him essentially weaponizing it about Ariana when it was a private conversation they had.
Him saying the below is indeed CORRECT.
Let’s get into my favorite part of the episode. Andy Cohen telling Sandoval that he should fire his PR team. This was in reference to the absurd comparisons that Sandoval made about himself and other huge news stories in an NYT profile piece. I think the best part is that the cast is SO wrapped up in themselves that they actually admitted they didn’t even READ the article. Brock goes as far to say he doesn’t want to pay for a NYT subscription (Wordle and Connections might spice up your day Brock, don’t knock it). Sandoval says “no one read it” and Andy says “I did” in unison with myself and every other person who OBVIOUSLY DID READ IT.
The remainder of the episode was fairly light, so here are the rest of my highlights:
Lala showed her true colors when she was trying to make excuses for Sandoval’s actions, producer Lala in FULLLLLLLLLL effect here.
Katie showed true growth and maturity by saying she “ate her words” about previously saying Brock was a bad parent now that she has seen how wonderful he is with Summer Moon (icon, legend, and star).
James showed he knows how to lighten the mood still by mentioning that an artistic wallpaper in Sandoval and Ariana’s house has an image of Leo DiCaprio walking out of Chateau Marmont with his arms around a tall, brunette model who is POTENTIALLY the same model that is now dating Sandoval (yuck).
Ariana showed her boundaries and self-restraint YET AGAIN by actually admitting she didn’t even watch this season.
All and all, I think it was actually a really good first episode because we got into some of the main questions all of us viewers had right away. I’m honestly not sure what else we can cover in 2 more episodes of this reunion, but consider me sat and ready to blab about it.